


sandcastles

by redlight



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, F/M, Ficlet, Guilt, M/M, Pining, laps lock, self blame, thought process
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-23 23:10:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17692922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redlight/pseuds/redlight
Summary: lance never listens.





	sandcastles

**Author's Note:**

> **i still havent seen season 8 so i dont know whats happening**

the easy explanation is that lance isn't a good listener.

he's got a problem, a trouble, sometimes it’s a _sorry, i forgot 'bout that_ , or sometimes it's _no i didn't get it when you said it_ , _sorry, sorry—_

he's not a good listener. it's why he had to retake physics i. it's why he needed to record lessons sometimes. it's why he can't get his thoughts _assembled enough_ that they make sense, never ever.

and, see, mama said, 'cause she's nice and lovely, she liked to say that lance has a big heart and _you listen to those in need, leandro, you listen, you listen_ , watched the way lance interacted with the other kids on the playground _in the grade school in the space school_ , but lance—

lance—

lance knows he's not great at this.

like, when allura tries to talk to him lance wants to help _he wants to help_ , and he shouldn't feel icky-slimy-wicked inside when she gives him that fragile smile that she doesn't really show anyone else at this point, 'cause allura likes to show ice-white teeth and ice-white hair, princess of the sharpest strength seen this side of this solar system, and that's just her, _that's just her_ , and he can't—

he smiles at her and tells her what she needs to hear because she's the most amazing person he's ever met, but this is it, the problem, lance has met so many amazing people and he never listens to them—

that's the easy answer.

he didn't listen to shiro.

and shiro asked, shiro _asked_.

shiro asked him _lance, lance, can you hear me?_ and lance didn't try hard enough didn't pay attention he _never ever_ pays attention, _lance, lance, lance espinosa you gotta get your shit together one of these days, what're you gonna do when you fall—?_

and, and—

and, and, and—

and, and lance, _lance_ is like a trainwreck about this.

shiro doesn't really like to talk to him—they're going back to earth, they are, they are, and lance is gonna kiss the shaky sand beneath his feet and _sink sink sink_ into that refined shattered-glass, he's a beach kid who dehydrated and evaporated into _desert-desert-sand_ but it's _his_ sand and he's gonna try and build-rebuild his crumbling sandcastles 'cause that's lance and that's what lance does.

lance is hopeless like that. sandcastles that drown in the waves, sandcastles that don’t stick together ‘cause there’s no water, he's either or he's both, but—

he's not any good at sandcastles either way, so it doesn't really matter.

allura is different, but lance gets an aching feeling in his heart when he thinks about her—and it's wretched, honestly, 'cause she needs him she needs _someone_ and shiro needs keith and hunk and pidge need each other, and allura has coran but lance wants to be good for her and give her _something, something_ , but god he just gets selfish and his—

his heart, the little aching space between his lungs where the saltwater likes to rise up and fuck with his ionic balance, where his ribs try to expand-inhale-decease-distill everything about him, it’s—it’s gonna shake forever if lance goes on like this.


End file.
